26 August 2012

A Public Service Announcment -- Part II


[The Announcement continues with Part II below:]

2.) "Where are all the REAL men?" (and other variations)

This one rankles my chains even more than the first one, and it too is your own damned fault. It's highly duplicitous to not be giving any sort of reply back (even if such a reply is the simple "Thanks for the message, but I'm just not that interested in you") and then to wring your hands on your profile by declaring that there aren't any "good," "decent," "nice," etc. ad nauseam men around.

The truth is that you probably are receiving quite a few decent messages. But, because the guy doesn't excite you right away, or doesn't make a ton of money, or isn't McDreamy, you ignore it. Many of you actually flag them for harassment and claim they're stalkers, "creeps," etc. and moderators such as myself often vote to let the message stand because there was nothing inherently wrong in the message aside from the fact that the sender wasn't your "dream type" or a "bad boy."

Many of those senders were in fact the very REAL men that you are bemoaning. But you pushed and/or drove them away. And once they're away, they're not going to come back. You refused to give them a chance, so they moved on and either found someone who did, or decided to pursue other things.

This attitude WILL come back to haunt you in the end. Many of you will remain single (or perhaps end up married and divorced) when you're in your mid-thirties. At that point, most men will easily see that any looks you've had are fading away fast and that your body is, for lack of better words, "used up." I see this quite a bit with women who made it clear that they spent their teens and twenty-something years partying away and going through ersatz "alpha boys" in the process. Now that they're in their thirties, the men their age want women ten years younger simply because such women haven't been "passed around" as much and they still have their youthful figure.

Such men have options, and they dare exercise them. Oh the humanity!

Go back to Part I

Go to Part III

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