Here stands a conduit containing a veritable mishmash of varied topics and thoughts dedicated to the raw musings that somehow manage to pop into the heads of two Random Plebeians in American society...One's abroad. One's not. Both try to avoid getting angry and cynical.
26 August 2012
A Public Service Announcment -- Part II
[The Announcement continues with Part II below:]
2.) "Where are all the REAL men?" (and other variations)
This one rankles my chains even more than the first one, and it too is
your own damned fault. It's highly duplicitous to not be giving any sort of
reply back (even if such a reply is the simple "Thanks for the message,
but I'm just not that interested in you") and then to wring your hands on
your profile by declaring that there aren't any "good,"
"decent," "nice," etc. ad nauseam men around.
The truth is that you probably are receiving quite a few decent
messages. But, because the guy doesn't excite you right away, or doesn't make a
ton of money, or isn't McDreamy, you ignore it. Many of you actually flag them
for harassment and claim they're stalkers, "creeps," etc. and
moderators such as myself often vote to let the message stand because there was
nothing inherently wrong in the message aside from the fact that the sender
wasn't your "dream type" or a "bad boy."
Many of those senders were in fact the very REAL men that you are
bemoaning. But you pushed and/or drove them away. And once they're away, they're
not going to come back. You refused to give them a chance, so they moved on and
either found someone who did, or decided to pursue other things.
This attitude WILL come back to haunt you in the end. Many of you will
remain single (or perhaps end up married and divorced) when you're in your
mid-thirties. At that point, most men will easily see that any looks you've had
are fading away fast and that your body is, for lack of better words,
"used up." I see this quite a bit with women who made it clear that
they spent their teens and twenty-something years partying away and going
through ersatz "alpha boys" in the process. Now that they're in their
thirties, the men their age want women ten years younger simply because such
women haven't been "passed around" as much and they still have their
men have options, and they dare exercise them. Oh the humanity!