So, with this in mind, let’s start with some base considerations that we can cull from the previous ten parts.
First and foremost: each of you chose to put up a profile and decide what we’re going to put up on it. Nobody actually forced you on pain of injury or death to actually join any of these dating sites and post profiles and information about yourself.
Thus in doing so, you made certain decisions to showcase certain things about yourself, and to follow certain patterns in communicating with men on these sites. You’ve also decided to complain about guys who tend to go towards certain things you’ve put on your profile, such as pictures showing off your boobs and arse, or how you’re a party-girl with a penchant for tattoos and piercings in odd places all over your body.
Obviously, if you’re doing quite a few of the things that I articulated in the previous ten parts and are still single, you’re obviously doing something wrong, and by that I mean: “the things you’re doing aren’t returning the results you’re intending.” This would then imply that some soul-searching is in order. You definitely need to be honest about what you truly want, and set reasonable standards and expectations (and no, expecting to get a clone of a popular movie star when you’re 80 pounds overweight with three kids from two different men is NOT reasonable).
Yes, it might be painful to realise that you’re not as attractive or romantically desirable as you currently think you are. Perhaps you really are asking for far too much in exchange for offering not a lot yourself. In any case, it’s reasonable to think that you’ll determine that at least one of two paths will be necessary:
- You need to make yourself more physically, emotionally, and sexually attractive to the classes of men that you really want, or
- You will need to come to terms with the facts that:
- In reality, you’re not as attractive as other women (meaning, as I’ve said in Part III, your true “market value” is lower than what you’re trying to advertise it as)
- Your range is broadly speaking going to consist of average men, and that
- You need to cultivate a pleasant personality and perhaps social and domestic skills to attract and sustain a solid relationship with such men.
So, after you’ve figured out where you want to focus your attention online, the second key is that you really need to be honest with yourself not just in what you want in a man, but also what you expect and what you offer in return. As I’ve said in previous parts, this is fundamental because any sort of lasting relationship—be it for romance or commerce is never one-sided. Both sides must continually give-and-take for any sort of endurance to be possible. And while you’re at it, make that known in your profile.
Next would be how you address the men who do approach you—yes, you’ll probably still get the much-loathed emails from chronically-horny men who just want to get their dicks wet and married men looking to cheat on their wives. Amidst all of that though, there probably will be some decent messages from guys who aren’t going to drool at the pics of your body or your perceived sexual prowess. Perhaps it might be useful to focus on these messages and ensure that all guys who send such messages at least get an honest reply back even if you’re not physically attracted to them on first sight.