25 April 2013

Alpha Lays and Beta Pays: More Than Meets the Eye (Part I)

Over the past nearly couple of years, Chewie and I have probably gone through hundreds, if not thousands, of profiles when we've seriously used online-dating sites. And while looking through many of these profiles (which now have really started to become a veritable blur), we've had some questions about things we've noticed. For example:

  • There's the Manosphere advice about using more than one dating site. Do women do the same thing?
  • If so, where do these women seem to flock to? 
  • Do the women maintain consistency (congruency) throughout their profiles?  
  • Do many of them attempt to compartmentalize  based on the sites they're using? 
  • Is there a significant move towards paid-subscription sites, or do most tend to resort to the popular "free" sites out there? 
  • Are the "Don't send me ___ messages" real or hypocritical?  

Being curious about these things, Chewie and I designed an initial experiment. Over the past month or so, we looked back at roughly 100 or so profiles that we've previously viewed and randomly selected. The ones we've looked at are white, Asian, and/or Hispanic women between the ages of 20 and 27, are (with one exception) childless, and live in southern Wisconsin or northern Illinois; which is within a reasonable range as Chewie and I both hail from that area, and these parameters represent the ostensible range for dates that a man like Chewie or myself would be looking for.

Given that between the two of us, we've been on PlentyOfFish (POF), DateHookup, and OkCupid (and for a bit, I did have access to Fling), we decided to start by using some of the POF matches we've seen listed as matches and/or ones that we've written to.

We then decided to do basic Google searches that conceivably would take the average person no more than 15-20 minutes to do. These searches primarily involved doing a Google search on their usernames, and then doing reverse-image searches. We noted what came up in terms of dating sites; outside of the four previously mentioned, we simply noted what was publicly available via these Google searches to create our data. Lest anyone accuse us of stalking, we point out that all we are doing is vetting a person to make sure she is who she says she is. The Internet abounds with reports of people meeting other people online who turn out to not be who they say they are, so searching for their information (all public) is something a prudent person should do.

It's worth mentioning that anyone with a working Internet connection could easily do what we did here and turn up that data via one's favourite search engine. Also, the reliance on Google's public search data explains why we didn't include certain sites (the most notable being eHarmony) as no data was available without a membership.

Brief statistical summary of our findings:

a.) Number of Profiles
  • Those 100 girls had 303 different profiles across nearly 30 different sites/networks; this averages out to 3 different profiles per girl 
  • 12% only had one dating profile, and thus used only one site.
  • 36% had two profiles
  • 25% had three profiles
  • The remaining 27% had 4 or more profiles (14% had 5 or more) 
  • One girl had 16 different profiles, another had 9, and a third had 7 

b.) Sites of Interest
  • 91% had a profile on POF
  • 53% used OkCupid
  • 26% used DateHookup
  • 16% used Match
  • 19% used other sites that covered an array of specific niches
  • 8% joined websites that cater to those seeking rich men (aka "sugar daddies") 
  • 30% were on Fling; of those, just under half of those had a paid membership and 7% had topless and/or nude photos included in their profile
  • 3% were on sites geared primarily towards sex, including fetish sites.

c.) Other Interesting Tidbits:

  • There was a tendency to use the same handle across most or all of their dating profiles (and even among those who don't, some will only slightly modify it)
  • There was often a tendency to reuse some of the pictures between profiles
  • With regards to the girls who've had Fling (or other sex-site) profiles, quite a few were ones who had otherwise said "I'm not looking for a hook-up" 
  • Of the eight girls who had joined a "sugar daddy" dating site, five also had profiles on Fling (and three of those five had paid for memberships at Fling)
  • A handful (5%) had posted topless or nude photographs or videos of themselves.   

[to be continued in Part II with our conclusions as well as some tips we'd like to share]

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